It’s totally true, right, and everyone like knows, it’s like well obvious, that a bloke with like loads of bling, like as if he’s totally minted, needs fixing up with a girl?
If this bloke with loads of dollar, like, moves somewhere new, even if he doesn’t know he needs to hook up with like, a girl, all the families in the area are all like, hello here’s a rich geezer we need to like get him to get off with our daughter before someone else like bags him first. It’s all like, he belongs to us already, he’s like our property?
So, right, Mrs Bennett turns round to Mr Bennett and just goes “yeah, no, do you know what? NetherfieldPark has been snapped up”
And Mr Bennett is like, whatevs.
And then right, Mrs Bennett turns round and goes, “well yeah, it has been, and Mrs Long, she was all like, yeah Netherfield Park has been bought, and I was all, no way, and she was all like yes way, and I was all, not even, and she was like I totally mean it, and then I was all god, I must tell Mr Bennett”
And Mr Bennett is like, whatevs. Like he’s not really like into it, but Mrs Bennett can totally see through that, and she’s all, yeah right, like you’re really not bothered.
So she turns round and goes, “Don’t you, like, not even want to know who has bought it?”
And he’s all, “No,yeah, whatevs, you want to tell me, and I’m not even bothered either way, sup to you, innit?”
This was invitation enough.
[Clearly, I have reached the point of grumpy middle age, where the speech patterns of young people have ceased being fascinating and amusing and just annoy the hell out of me. It does worry me that the generation who have grown up talking in this way will be addressing Judges and like, have these horrible little verbal tics slip out? I do already, I have to say, see a lot of advocates who are under the impression that if you read out a long assertion and then raise your intonation slightly at the end, that somehow constitutes a question… which is the opposite of the young people who give the inadvertent impression that every statement is a question by doing the same thing]